John Wilson on Shepherds

Speaking to the church’s crisis of identity and crisis of leadership, John F. Wilson made the following statement at the annual Restoration Quarterly Breakfast in 1991:

“...the very word ‘shepherd,’ though we hear it from time to time in the church, sounds contrived. This is because the ‘flock’ does not consider itself thus—especially in well-educated or upwardly mobile churches. We feel more comfortable drawing our analogies from the corporate world. We are not sheep, following our shepherds to the fold. Rather, we are individuals who belong to many communities, among them, a church. This church is not our primary group, though it is very important to us, of course. The leaders of this group are not in any sense the shepherds of our lives. Instead, they are the volunteers one tends to find in any organization, who are willing to give some time and energy to keeping the church program going, handling the money, supervising the staff, and so on. They would be quite uncomfortable actually acting like shepherds—and most of us would be very uncomfortable if they were to try.”

7 Questions toward Evaluating Criticism

Jerrie Barber is one of my ministry heroes. I love how he ministers to ministers, I love how he is willing to confront an issue, even if uncomfortable, head-on, I love his willingness to own his own weirdness, and I just love being around him and his unique way of saying things. BUT, there are things I don’t love. I can’t stand how he loves criticism (and he can’t be upset with me saying that, since he loves criticism). I’ve tried, but so far, I can’t. I’ve listened but just can’t get there. From the lady who described me as her fat preacher back 35 years ago (now if she’d said I was her Phat Preacher, that’d be another deal), to the man who offered the elder $500 a week to fire me since I didn’t preach exclusively from his KJV, I struggle with enjoying critics and criticism. 

But, criticism is a part of ministry. Always has been, always will be. As I like to say “I signed up for this.” 

Yet, how you deal with it affects your joy and your joy will affect your effectiveness. Jerrie teaches me that different people will handle criticism differently. I say that to say that not everything I say here will help everyone. But, here are a few questions I’ve collected over the years of being human that help me evaluate how I deal with criticism and critics: 

• Do you try to really see yourself? Can you honestly step back and look into the mirror of yourself and ask: “Is this thing said about me true or false?” If it is false can you reject it? If it is true is it something you can improve?

• Have you grown? Are you stagnate or are you willing to try to become better as a result of your critics? Have you made any effort to change, to improve, to add to your toolbox? I don’t like criticism but when it is correct some of my best growing has been from it.

• Can you admit that you could be wrong about something? If not you are probably heading toward a lifetime of moving boxes and restarts. I heard Aubrey Johnson say that one of the keys of highly effective people is the ability to say: “I could be wrong.” I could be wrong, but I think he’s right! Here’s how you personally test if you can do this: Have you admitted that you have been wrong about something?

• Do you have people in your life who can correct you and speak truths into your life that you then accept and try to correct or improve? Who? When? If you can’t chart a history of learning from the people who you love and respect and who love you and have a vested interest in your improvement then you are quite possibly a fool. Did I say that out loud? I’m just paraphrasing Solomon (Proverbs 12:15; c.f. 1:5; 11:14; 15:22; 19:20). 

• Can you spot it when someone suggests something about you that is wrong and be OK with them not liking you for what they perceive that is a wrong perception? I had a person say to me a few years ago: “You never say that you are a sinner.” I thought, “I think I do that often.” So I asked some people who hear me often and who are honest with me and they all were shocked someone even said that. Now, that someone thinks of me that way has made me more self-aware and to be sure I’ve tried to be even more transparent about my own struggles, but even that can be overdone.

• Can you live with the fact that you will never be perfect here but still keep trying? I remember dad once saying something about making grammatical mistakes when speaking that it was a reminder that he is not perfect. If you knew dad, you know he didn’t make many such mistakes but it made me aware. He went on about people realizing you are not perfect and relating to you. My struggle that is obvious is my weight. A dear friend once joked that he wanted to call me Duncan because my weight was up and down, up and down (like a Duncan yo-yo). Yeah, it’s ongoing. I am not perfect here (and weight is not the only thing), but I do remain in the struggle to be better.

• Can I find some positivity in it? My friend Ryan Gallagher says it helps to try to find the positive even in the negative. 

Hope this little set of questions helps you. What would you add?

What's Right With The Church

author note: I originally wrote this for www on July 19, 2011 at their request. Today I have an even larger view of the church and her health and feel even MORE optimistic about the present and the future.

Any article dealing with what’s good about the church should be gazed at through the lens of:

• The reality that in the mind of God, the gift of Christ, the Pen of the Spirit and the design of the Godhead everything about the church is good, not just good, but great! There are no flaws in the heavenly design of this present bound rocket-ship to eternity (Matthew 16:16-18; Ephesians 3:10-12; Daniel 2:44-45; Acts 2:15-21, 41-47).

• But to acknowledge that reality without being continually cognizant of the constant actuality that the church is flawed from the earthbound human side is nothing more than creating a Pollyanna outlook that will lead to a disappointment severe enough to sink your faith. I have personally been a part of eight wonderful but very real congregations from the time I became a Christian 40 years ago. Each of them blessed my life more than cursing it, and each nurtured my faith while challenging me with differing issues within them. Each at times have been remarkably encouraging causing me to soar, and each at times has disappointed me causing me to question my place in that congregation.

One of the real weaknesses I see in many in our brotherhood is an over-analysis syndrome that often leads to self-hatred. About a year ago, I attended a program on church plantings put on by one of the more progressive para-church organizations out there (Karios, I think they would agree with my adjective). It was a useful time but the highlight was one of the speakers who was not a member of the churches of Christ. He spoke of traditional strengths of the church which was rich because the things he cited as our strengths were the things that many in the room have been running away from. He talked about autonomy, about church governess (i.e. elders, deacons), about a’cappella singing, about the weekly observance of the Lord’s Supper. Then he said one of “your” real weaknesses seems to be a “self-hatred of your rich history.” I had lunch about 10 years ago with one of the leaders of the progressive movement in our fellowship. He asked how things were going in my work and as I talked about how much I loved it he said: “That’s refreshing. So many of the preachers I spend time with are unhappy with their work and hopeless about the future.” I remember thinking: “I’ve heard you speak, it is not surprising you attract those who are malcontent.” Why is it that those who seem most progressive in our fellowship are also the most malcontent? I think it begins with a desire to change to make things better – but then it doesn’t know how to stop – so it feeds itself. I get most bashed when I talk good about the church by those at either extreme. Randell Matheny said it well about ten years ago: “From their bashing of the brotherhood, some seem to hate their spiritual inheritance, preferring instead to laud religious departures from the Word” (http://forthright.antville.org/stories/1001252/).

So with a sense of reality I want to write about what is good about the church.

Several years ago, Joe Barnett first put out a tract with the title “Churches of Christ, Who Are These People?” It was always one of my favorites and to this day is a relevant classic. I’ve been around members of the churches of Christ for over nearly 50 years now. I’ve watched them across our country and in over twenty other countries and I’ve noticed a few things.

The churches of Christ, who are these people? They are caring, loving, compassionate people of Christ who respond to any real need whether it be spiritual or physical (They have taken the lead in low maintenance relief efforts. Whether through the local church or para-church organizations like Disaster Relief or Healing Hands, by far the greatest amount of dollars given go to the individuals it was meant to help, not to pay marketers and for marketing plans). Witness the millions given to places like Ethiopia, Poland, Africa, India, Japan, Haiti: Find any disaster and nearby you’ll find members of the churches of Christ standing with loving and meaningful support. They give sacrificially and spontaneously. They give from the oldest to the youngest. They don’t like to see others hurt or oppressed because they genuinely love people like God does. Is it surprising? While we are not a “social gospel folk” our fervor for the Word has made us leaders in social relief!

The churches of Christ, who are these people? They love young people. Their biggest events in the local church and in the larger brotherhood are youth events (Lads to Leaders, Winterfest, CYC, VBS, Bible Camp, etc). We care about our children going to heaven and their faith.

The churches of Christ, who are these people? They are people who want to do right. My experience has been that members of the church of Christ want to do right. They make mistakes, sometimes gross and glaring and hard-to-forget ones, but not because the desire to do right is not there. I’ve never heard a single one of them say they were the only ones going to heaven or claim perfection. I have heard them say over and over that anyone who obeys God will be saved by His grace. Now, they strive for perfection, but isn’t that what we all ought to do?

The churches of Christ, who are these people? They are people who are forgiving. I’ve seen it time and again. Just when a situation looks out of hand, repentance occurs and God’s people rush to the aid and defense of the penitent one. They forgive and accept back people whom others would not. It’s not just a second chance, but a third and fourth and…

The churches of Christ, who are these people? They are people who sometimes argue. They argue because they are passionate about Truth. Seldom are the arguments that I’ve seen engaged in the result of either side not wishing to follow God’s Word, but on how to best follow the Divine Instructions. And they are patient: They may not like where someone lands but they are so slow to cut people off.

The churches of Christ, who are these people? They are not credal. Sometimes people will talk about the church being strict or narrow-minded. My experience is that since we have no creed but the Bible we offer greater freedom than most religious groups. Prove it by the Bible, and there will be no creed to keep your congregation from practicing it.

The churches of Christ, who are these people? They are people who wish to hear the Word of God held up as their authority. They get low marks sometimes in tact, an area where most are sincerely working on improving, but what they lose in tact is often made up for in sheer desire to be true to God’s Word. They want to hear preachers give Biblical evidence to support what they are saying. They are sincere and simple in their pure attempt to remain true to God’s teaching. Most of them are not condemning, or cruel, or judgmental; but patient and kind and searching for God’s truths.

The churches of Christ, who are these people? They are people who wish to see God’s Word preached around the world and will make sacrifices to see that it is done. They will give of their money, time, talent and energy to take that Word to the poorest, remotest village in the world. And they’ll wear a big smile as they go.

The churches of Christ, who are these people? They are my brothers and sisters scattered across the globe. They make mistakes, but they are only human and God knows that. He also knows their intentions and their hearts. I am thankful to be a part of such a people.

The churches of Christ. Why don’t you investigate further? Let me close with a few things I love about the church:

• I love the church local. I love church autonomy. Willard Collins once said that “anything that God wants done can be done through the local church” and he was correct.

• I love the struggling church. I love that we are aware that we are fellow strugglers.

• I love the healthy church – that even when we struggle we still serve.

• I love the young church - full of vigor and vitality. We have so many young people who have a noteworthy commitment to Her.

• I love the church old - who give generously, who never give up, who add wisdom and depth to our fellowship.

• I love the commitment to the Bible – something worth leaning on.

Kindness? In this Climate?

We live in a world of a lot of conflict. It seems the level of mean spiritedness and political divisiveness has spilled over into every aspect of life. We seem to be at a point where every thought, post, comment, like, etc it filtered through political bias. As if a democrat can’t have an intelligent thought or a homosexual can’t be a loving person. The polarization of our nation forum has only served to polarize us even more. May I remind Christians that truth is truth regardless of who says it and error is error regardless of its source.

This has infected even some who profess godliness to the point that they feel justified in being mean, snarky, or unthoughtful in their approaches to others. Some even have defended their ugliness as standing for truth. The fact is true truth has no need to ever be ugly, it stands without a need for any self-righteous or self-serving commentary. Still others in some misconstrued self-delusion think the louder they talk and the more caustic their approach the more they will convince others. And, if you don’t join in their “righteous efforts” they will turn their venom on you as one who is not willing to stand for right. I would remind us that 1 Peter 3:15 that answer we are to be prepared to give is the answer for “the hope that in you lives.” 

When people talk about our dad, Jerry Jenkins, they have two comments. Either they will say, “I’ve never known anyone who led more people to the Lord” or they say, “He was the kindest man I ever knew.” Those two are not accidental or exclusive of each other. In fact, I’d assure you that one fed the other. I cannot remember the number of times dad taught us that how you treat others either opens or closes doors. That if you get ahead of the Gospel you may win some fights but you won’t win as many souls. 

Yes, sometimes stands can and sometimes people’s reaction to truth will make them determine to not accept the Good News, but let it never be our attitudes that affect such.

I want to suggest that we do not have to comment on every social ill and that self-righteousness will harm the cause of Christ more than gentle graciousness. Please know that I do not believe he was perfect but while others were winning little skirmishes dad was opening doors and then treating people with such goodness that he won souls to the Lord. 

I know it is challenging to know when to and when not to post, comment, react, but I challenge you to think before you do if that comment will actually lead to bringing someone to Christ or pushing them further away.

“…we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God” (2 Corinthians 5:20).

Books...

On the fly without any time Lonnie Jones, David Baker, Paul Spurlin, Brandon Presnell and I were asked for a list of books that would be most useful for a youth minister. The question was prefaced with an understanding that the Bible is the best book to shape EVERY part of our lives. There is no book that replaces or supersedes it. Second, that any book written by any human will have mistakes and flaws in it but that does not preclude it from having helpful and insightful information in it. And finally, that recommending some of a book does not endorse all of that book nor does it endorse everything else the author has written or said. With those, here is our cold list:

Raising Self Reliant Children in a Self-indulgent World, H. Stephen Glenn and Jane Nelsen Ed.D.

Sticky Faith, Kara Powell

Lunch Ladies, Philip Jenkins

Sustainable Youth Ministry, Mark DeVries

Just Listen, Mark Goulston

Emotional Intelligence,  Justin Bariso

Pedagogue, Lonnie Jones

Canoeing the Mountains, Tod Bolsinger

 A Failure of Nerve, Edwin H. Friedman

People Styles at Work, Robert Bolton and Dorothy Grover Bolton

Getting to Yes, Roger Fisher and William L. Ury

The Most Loving Place in Town, Ken Blanchard and Phil Hodges

The Creative Leader, Ed Young, JR

Do Your Job

It seems some among us find some sort of sadistic joy in pointing out any error or perceived error of our brethren, any short-coming of our brotherhood they can hone in on and then abuse to promote what seems an agenda. As one outsider said: “I have never seen a group who has as much self-hatred as members of the church of Christ exhibit.” I would not, nor have I ever heard any sane brother claim we have everything perfected. Yet it is our noble, right, and righteous goal to strive to restore New Testament Christianity. 

I want to address something that I think we got right in teaching but it seems often have fallen short of in practice. This might be, for some, the truth that we need to practice what we preach. 

The Biggest thing you can do is the best thing you can do and that is do your job. Yes, do your job (Romans 12:3-8).

Preachers/ministers - preach/minister. Speak the Word, study it, prepare for it, learn to present, study every aspect you can of it. Don’t hold back God’s truth because you are fearful or might lose a paycheck, don’t be a hireling, Speak truth in love. Don’t short circuit either of those non-negotiables. Spend more time reading God’s Word than scouring social media or the newest book of cool sermons from some cool preacher. Then preach. Minister. Be there in the big events of people’s lives, love them, listen to them, hear their problems, aid them in their troubles, make time for them. Minister (Colossians 4:17; 2 Timothy 4:2). And, might I add, stop trying to be the elder, shepherd, bishop of the church. Do your job.*

Shepherds - shepherd. Care, lead, and guide with gentleness. Take challenging stands with force and grace, it can be done. Consider each sheep, even the difficult ones (maybe, especially the difficult ones). Lead the sheep to good waters, green fields, over difficult terrain, in the midst of storms. Get them to the ultimate safe place. Take stands against wolves, especially the ones in sheep’s clothing. Don’t spend your energies on deacons’ work, serving tables, or arranging chairs on a sinking ship. Don’t push the hard to the bottom of the agenda or excuse your responsibility because a person might be difficult to deal with. Be diligent in your position against evil with strength and force, and just as diligent in assuring the church is a place of love. Love, know, and tend the sheep. Shepherd (1 Peter 5:2). Do your job. 

Deacons - diákonos, serve. Prove yourself. Take on a job and see it through. Own your area(s) of responsibilities. Don’t quit at the first sign of difficulty. Don’t retreat from your roll just because it may not be as important as you think you are. Do the difficult and seemingly menial so elders can shepherd and ministry can preach. Serve. Show up. Be diligent, creative, and a submissive leader. Serve (1 Timothy 3:8-10). Do your job.

Yes, we have our challenging but the church is the Lord’s let’s all serve in our rolls as if He were the one watching. Remember, Revelation, HE KNOWS our works…do your job. 

*In case you are wondering, I preached this to myself first today.

Boo-birds?

I’ve heard it and i think one of the most classless things that a fan can do is boo their own team. I heard it again yesterday. Our Tennessee Titans were playing. They’ve not been an overall winning team in a long time and at times they are just weak as a team. But they were getting beat at a team everyone thought we should not get beat by. And out came the “boo-birds.” Expectation turned to frustration and then to exasperation. i’ve never heard it, even among the fanbase of the worst teams and thought, “yep, that’s a smart move.” It just makes no sense to boo your own team. Let me give you five reasons why.

1. You’re a fan: You are supposed to be FOR them! While booing may communicate a number of things, NONE of them is support. In the “How To Be A Good Fan” media guide you will never see a fan cupping his hands and screaming “Go Team!!! Booooo!!!!” To quote the Gieco commercial: “That’s not how it’s done, that’s not how any of this is done!”

2. You couldn’t do better, but you are correcting them: Men 40 years past their prime (which wasn’t that good anyway) and 40 pound over playing weight scream their complaints to the guy who are actually DOING it, playing the game. You don’t hear guys in the surgery observation deck (do those exist?) ragging on the surgeon - “com’ on, you can cut better than that! You need to be faster than that!” 

3. Nobody ever got better by being booed: No player ever was interviewed after a win who said, ‘You know, we were playing and really stinking it up, and I heard a large group of our fans in Section R47 booing and I thought, ‘man, we need to get it together.’ I really want to thank them, We couldn’t have won without that boo’ing.” Booing doesn’t make anyone better. In fact, it’d make me worse. It’d make me want to get away, to believe I wasn’t wanted. 

4. The story is not over yet: In the game I referenced earlier the team played pretty pitiful early on and fell behind by three scores. But in the second half they rallied and ended up winning in a super comeback. It made the all those booing look pretty bad. 

5. You may not know everything you think you know. You don’t know if Michael Jordan has the flu or in the star player’s dad just died or if there is conflict they are working through on a team or if a coach has already been dismissed and they are working on the details. There’s often much and important info that you don’t know.

I know you think we’ve been talking about football, but the same can be applied to churches, to ministers, to elderships, even to individual Christians. Read through it again with that in mind. And stop booing the elders and preacher!  

Sermon Checklist Manifesto

This is not a book review, so stay with me. Someone recommended "The Checklist Manifesto" to me a while back and it has been my Audible book for this week. The Seattle Times says that Checklist, written in 2009 by surgeon Atul Gawande is “about how to prevent highly trained, specialized workers from making dumb mistakes.” He not only reviews how something as seemingly simple as a checklist dramatically reduced patient death and other difficulties following surgery, but he also talks to a construction manager, a master chef, a venture capitalist and the man at The Boeing Co. who writes checklists for airline pilots. 

He sold me. I’ve always been a list person. I just do better with lists and deadlines. And it got me to thinking. If there was a checklist for sermons what would be on yours? Here’s my start:

HAVE I PRAYED ABOUT THIS SPECIFIC SERMON? This must be where it begins. Prayer cleanses your heart and focuses your mind. If God is not invited in then it can quickly become your rant, your hypothesizing, your opinions and not HIS Truth and HIS Message. I have about three prayers I pray every Sunday about sermons. One is pretty simple and it part of my prayer driving to the church building. I don’t know, it may not even be right but I take it from Samson’s prayer in Judges 16:28 “Then Samson called to the LORD and said, “O Lord GOD, please remember me and please strengthen me only this once, O God…” God, help me again today, this one time to do this well. Some weeks it’s a cry to strength to make it through a difficult sermon, other weeks it’s a prayer to help me communicate a challenging or controversial text, still others it’s a plea for a week where I’ve not found the time I wished to prepare as well as I want. The second prayer I pray right before I get in the pulpit, Rick Warren actually made me think of this: “God, You love these people and I love these people, You love me and these people love me. Help me not to see this as an audience to fear or attack but a people to love. Love these people through me.” And the final prayer I find myself praying most every week is on Sunday night after all the day has died down I’ll begin praying about the next sermon I’m preaching. That is actually a prayer that I will take with me throughout the activities of the week. 

DID I INCLUDE JESUS IN THE MESSAGE?  Argue with me on this statement. If Jesus is not in the sermon it should not be preached. Isn’t He the message? Isn’t He who we are told to preach? Hear Paul “I am determine to know nothing among you but Jesus Christ and Him crucified.” “We preach Jesus.” I’ve quoted my friend David Shannon’s sermon altering statement often: “The quality of a sermon is determined by how long it is till Jesus shows up in it.”

HAVE I PROPERLY EXEGETED THE TEXT? Have I studied the context? Have I looked at the language? Have I taken apart each word to see what is in it? 

HAVE I TAKEN MY EMOTIONS OUT OF IT? Stay with me on this one. We’ll talk about passion next but for now the question is am I pushing an agenda I am passionate about, am I trying to attack a person I am upset with, do I get anything carnal out of preaching this text, am I pandering to a part of the audience? 

HAVE I FOUND MY PASSION FOR THIS? If you do not preach with passion, go get some! Preaching without passion is pointless. You’ll never convict anyone. I got this from my dad. His ability to bring his passion into a message convicted thousands, I was one of those thousands. 

IS THERE A CHALLENGE IN THE MESSAGE? Stated another way, have I told them what to do with this message? I always include a challenge to respond publicly to the sermon. I don’t think that HAS to be done but I don’t know why someone would not. My personal challenge here is to try to keep that fresh and not just as a tag on line. BUT more than that I want to give the audience agenda item from the sermon. What can they do right now, today, this week, this month that applies to this sermon? This is not always easy but it is, I believe, essential. 

DO I KNOW WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY? I think it was Dr. Lori Barr from Austin who I first heard use the term elevator speech. I didn’t know what it meant but before she was done explaining it I knew it would become a part of my life. In case you don’t know, an elevator speech is your message given in such a short time that you could tell it to a stranger in the elevator between the time the doors closed and they opened again on an elevator trip. Some would call it a thesis statement. But it is the why (and some of the what) of the message. 

DOES THE MESSAGE MAKE SENSE? I like to sometime from Thursday night to Saturday night I try to while my wife and I are sitting at home, go over the sermon in about 2 to 3 minutes and just ask: “Did that make sense?” She sometimes says yes, and sometimes will say “what?”,  and sometimes will have a suggestion or two, and sometimes she will say “no.” I really dread that “no.”  But if I can’t explain what I am trying to get across to her how to I think I will be able to talk to a whole audience who can’t give that feedback that week? 

WHAT QUESTIONS HAVE I LEFT UNANSWERED? This one may be a little odd but a few years ago I was listening to a really good lesson on a text but at some point in working the way through the text he didn’t deal with what seemed to me to be an obvious question. And I got stuck. He left me behind at that question. I missed the rest of his lesson trying to work through what that part of the text meant. You’ll miss this sometimes because the text is familiar to you, but go back and try to ask “if I were reading this text for the first time where would I struggle to understand, what questions would I have?” Don’t let this sabotage the sermon or send you chasing rabbits for too long but don’t let it be a barrier that keeps the hearer from getting the point either. 

HAVE I TOUCHED THE HEART? For a few blessed years my sister sat in the audience. I remember one Sunday afternoon I went to see her. I was feeling all good and chipper about the sermon that day. She said: “It had a lot of good stuff in it but it didn’t touch my heart.” That was powerful. In all of our frothing at the mouth about how how we can’t let our heart guide us (and rightly so, for the Text deals with that too), the heart must be touched, pricked, stirred, quickened or else you’ll both bore your audience and short-short-circuit your effectiveness.

So, there’s my 10 questions on my sermon checklist for now. What would you add? What are yours?

Preachers Love Books!

So, what’s in your library? You’ve probably got a set of GA Commentaries, if you are over 40 you probably have that massive collection of Pulpit Commentaries. I bet you’ve got Guy N.’s Questions and Answers. You have copy or two of Muscle and A Shovel - at least one was given to you. You have a few sermon outline books. I hope you have a copy of a book written by a Jenkins, dad, Jeff, Philip, Ancil, or me (if not, I can tell you where to get one). You have a collection of Bibles. You’ve got a few church growth books and a shelf of books on Marriage and the Family. It’s likely you have a few that are worth something monetarily. You probably have a couple that were written by friends and some autographed by author releases. Preachers seem to have always loved book.  

I’ve been asked several times over the years to share lists of my most useful books, or to contribute to lists that otter’s are compiling. I enjoy doing that. 

Let me give you a few surprising ones to add:

Alexander and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day: Like all of these they are short, simple, and children’s books really, but have powerful and important lessons for adults and, maybe especially those of us in ministry. Alexander learns how to deal with tough days.

The Velveteen Rabbit: This is a classic. Nobody I know becomes more “real” than preachers. If you can make it through this and personalize it without a tear - you are a tough dude!

Oh The Places You’ll Go: Some of you knew this would be on here. If for no other reason the section on The Waiting Place. Man. The good Seuss is spot on. For years I have read this book to graduating seniors and had them sign it. My copy has become pretty special to me. 

Bear, Your Manners Are Showing: In this day of Social Media and public meanness. Melanie read this 1987 release most every night to our toddler sons. LIttle Bear has much to say today and, may I say frankly, I know some preachers who need to sit a copy of this book right UNDER their Bible.

How to Be A Grouch, by Oscar the Grouch: Just saying. Sometimes the best way not to be one is to have someone tell you what one looks like.

What silly book(s) would you add to this list?

Unreported Benefits

Do you remember when you got your first real paycheck? I started mowing yards when I was 9 or 10 with my brother but my first job that gave me a paycheck was when I was 12 or 13 and started bussing tables at “The Great American Hamburger and Soda Fountain Restaurant” in Eastwood Mall. I had to get a Work Permit to let me do it. I remember doing the math: If I work 20 hours in a week and I make (I think it was) $2.60 an hour and I get a paycheck for two weeks at a time I will make $104! And then I got that check and it was for like $85-90, what? It had all sort of weird words on it to me like FICA and Alabama State Income Tax, Withholding Tax. So for nearly 45 years now I’ve looked at my pay stubs. Sometimes I’ve thought, “man, I wish I made as much as that first line says.” Other times I’ve breathed a prayer of thanksgiving for the blessings afforded me in this land that some of those taxes help make possible. But I have a confession to make today.

Don’t tell the IRS but all of my pay is not reflected in my pay-stub! No, I’m not getting unreported income under the table or tips for my sermons on Sunday (yeah, I get tips but not the money kind :)). But I am getting stuff for which the IRS has no reporting form.

I get to watch a dad baptize his daughter into Christ and weep tears of joy.

I get to be the first to see a newborn as mom and dad proudly show off and take a picture with the preacher.

I get to pray beside the bed of a deeply loved saint about ready to meet God.

I get to be confronted by the Word of God IN my Work. 

I get to stand in front of people and bring a Message of God’s Grace.

I get to hear a sound more beautiful than angels singing, as I prepare to walk onto the stage each Sunday and listen to our teens praise God with others in song. 

I get to work with the best folks in the world on the best Projects.

I get to be with people at the greatest moments of their lives.

I get to share with people in their hurt. 

I get to get high fives from kids and hugs from little old ladies.

I get grace from God AND His People.

I get a front row seat in God’s working in people’s lives.

I get to be God’s Man in front of people even though I am very human, and their respect spurs me to higher living. 

Not sure how to report all of that to the IRS, so I’ll just tell God thank You and spend the rest of my life “working” off that big ole unrepayable debt. 

SEVEN WAYS PREACHERS CAN ENCOURAGE ONE ANOTHER

It happens over, and over, and over again. We hear about preachers losing their jobs or dropping out of ministry because the pressures are so great.

This article is not about who is right or wrong when a preacher loses his job. I’m certain there is enough blame to go around.

This is a plea from my heart that those of us who are preaching brothers will do everything we can to encourage one another.

With apologies to those of you who are reading this who are not preachers, it is true that there is no one who can understand the life and work of a preacher better than another preacher.

I have talked to more preachers than I can count who are suffering in silence.

They have been chastised by their elders, their deacons, or some well-meaning fellow Christian.

Their feeling is that they are under-appreciated. They feel that few really know all that they do. They feel that few really care about their families, their health, their mental well-being, and their spiritual walk with the Lord.

Okay, take a deep breath. I know that some of you guys who are reading this would say, “Jeff, I’ve never felt that way, and those who have need to get over it.” I’m thankful you’ve never been treated like that or that you’ve never been made to feel that way, but be careful brother, about saying someone who has needs to get over it. At least until you’ve walked in their shoes.

So, most of us who preach understand these thoughts and feelings. This is a plea to all of us who preach to encourage, strengthen, support, and love a fellow preacher who is struggling. Let’s consider how we can encourage and support one another. If you are not a preacher, why not join in with us as we seek to encourage one another.

OFFER WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT. As we mentioned earlier, there are enough negative and critical words spoken in our world. Those of us who are preachers don’t need to add to what has already been said.

Remember that as Christians we have been charged with speaking words, that are “good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.” (Ephesians 4:29)

Make a phone call or a personal visit, send an email, a letter, a text, or a Facebook message. Sit down with someone who is hurting and just listen. Listen with your heart. Show compassion and concern. There are many ways we can encourage.

ENCOURAGE A PREACHER’S FAMILY. If you know a brother who is struggling, be sure to ask him how his family is doing? If your wife is a good encourager, ask her to call the struggling preacher’s wife. Ask about the children. See if there is anything that can be done to encourage the family.

TALK TO OUR FATHER. It has been my personal practice to keep a running list of preachers who I know are dealing with difficulties, as well as preachers who have contacted me to ask for prayers.

I do my best to pray though that list on a weekly, sometime daily basis. One of the greatest gifts we can give to a brother who is struggling is the gift of knowing we are praying for them. If you tell someone you are going to pray for them write it down and be sure you follow through (If you would like to be added to my list please send me private message, no details needed!)

EXTEND GRACE & FORGIVE. There are times that the preacher who is struggling is the one who is in the wrong. Perhaps he has brought his struggle on himself. I am not writing this to say that preachers are always right.

I know from my own life that all of us have to constantly watch ourselves. Our own decisions and choices can bring pain to our lives and the lives of our family. That is why we must constantly examine ourselves to be sure that we are, “In the faith.” (2 Corinthians 13:5)

DON’T PRY OR ASK TOO MANY QUESTIONS. Some people (and this includes some of us who preach) pride themselves in knowing every sordid detail about every problem in the church. They want to be able to “report” to others about the heartaches of those who are suffering.

I have seen preachers who pry into the lives of people just so they will know. Be careful to not “stick your nose,” where it is not needed. Be careful about asking too many questions. Someone who is hurting will tell you what they want you to know or what they feel you need to know to be able to help.

DON’T FORGET ABOUT ONE ANOTHER AFTER THE INITIAL CONTACT. Please don’t overlook this very important part of the helping process. Many times, we reach out to a hurting brother, pray for him, encourage him, and then we forget about him.

Hurts and pains don’t quickly go away. Make another phone call, send another note, reach out again, sometime after the initial contact. When a hurting brother knows that we won’t drop him it will mean the world to him. Since learning about the return of my wife’s cancer, one of my preaching brethren has texted me regularly just to say he is praying for us. It has meant more to us than he’ll ever know.

BUILD UP PREACHERS IN THE PRESENCE OF OTHERS. Work overtime not to be critical of a preacher in the presence of other preachers, church leaders, or members. If someone hears you “speaking out of school,” they will not feel that they can trust you when they need to be able to reach out.

Brothers, those of us who preach are blessed to be a part of a very special fraternity. The best friends I have in my life are preachers. Some of them are older, some of them are younger, and some of them are my age (some of you are thinking, that would be the same as the older ones)! God has blessed my life beyond measure by my preaching brothers.

Let’s help one another during difficult times. Let’s reach out to one another. Let’s thank God for one another.

Dear Father, we know that we have some brothers who are hurting right now. Help us, dear God to reach out to them. Help us to encourage them in every way possible. Help us to pray for those around us who are hurting. Dear Father, please give a special measure of Your grace to those who need it right now. In the Name of the One who will give us rest we pray, Amen.

 

Odd Interview Questions. “What?”

Ah, interviews. You never know what you are going to get into. Most every preacher has a ton of stories on them. They can be done right and they can be a train wreck. We asked: “What’s the oddest question you’ve ever been asked in an interview for a job with a church?” What follows are some of the most interesting answers we got (and maybe a few comments from us). And, then a crazy story of an interview I had. Remember, primary purpose of THIS post is just foolishness.

“Is your wife submissive to you?” (Uh, let’s see...I think she told me to answer that “yes.”)

Are you for Alabama or Auburn? (I’m not sure why the person that submitted this one thought it was an odd question! It’s obviously a vital question!)

I was asked to accept the work but keep it quiet because they had promised to try out other preachers. (“So, we’re going to lead with deceit?”)

I was timidly asked over the phone by one of the elders, you don’t have any racial things going on do you? (Huh?)

The most recent was "Which day of the week do you take off?"  My response was "I thought I only worked one day a week!"   7 of the 8 elders laughed!  (Well, played.)

Do you know the difference between Coastal Christians and Intercostal Christians? (“Hmmm? One baptizes in baptistries and the other in the ocean?”)

Did I vote in the last election? (“Did you?”)

What is your credit score? (I predict this will be a routine question in the not to distant future.)

Do you use ONLY the KJV? (“No, sometimes I preach out of the Greek text? Is that OK?”)

I was asked if I would be interested in mowing the lawn for the church building along with the lawn for the preacher's house. (Been there, done that.)

"What is your wife going to do?" I asked, "Why do you want to know? Are you going to pay her too?" (And, you didn’t get the job, right?)

Do you preach as good as Dale Jenkins.  Just kidding.  What is the least amount of money you will take to come to this church? (If I had a dollar for every time that first question was asked....I couldn’t buy a Krystal)

Do you play Golf? (“By ‘play’ what exactly do you mean?”) Side note, most every question asked, is the result of a past experience.

What is your view of the Masonic lodge. Asked from a Mason on the search committee. (“What is your view of the KKK?”)

On a scale of 1-10, how conservative are you? (“Your scale or Christ’s?”)

I was young, real young. The congregation did not have elders so they invited all the men into a room and for over 2 hours fired questions at me. Theological questions, practical questions, “how would you” questions. I have always loved Q&A time, so I was loving it. 

Until. BIll asked: “Do you split the sex?” I was confused, stunned, totally unsure of what he meant. Well, he was an older man, maybe I misunderstood the question. “Would you repeat the question?” “Do you split the sex?” Maybe I was being set up, see how this quay handles himself on his feet, if we can trip him up. I paused...as long as I could. I thought, what could he mean? 

In my mind I was thinking: “No, and that would be none of your business.” 

Finally, Ronnie, said. “Brother Bill, I’m not sure I understand what you are asking.” Whew, I wasn’t the only one. He said, “Like, when you preach, do you split the sex. Do you call out the Baptists and Methodists? Do you split the sects?”

Some things sound different than they look!

And, everyone in the room had a relieved laugh.

What’s the oddest one you’ve been asked? 

A Dozen Little Known

Proper etiquette is a funny thing. It doesn’t matter to you until you know it and then you can’t help but notice it.  It is worth knowing because some who know it will judge you solely by it. I think the first time I realized that Melanie and I were with some very ‘highflauting” folks in Atlanta when we were fairly newly married and I was trying out for a job. After a ride past ‘the old home place” (a huge colonial mansion on a hill) we met with the elders and their wives for a meal (and a grilling). Before the meal I had warmed tomato juice with the men, while Melanie learned about instructing your “help” to not mix your fine silverware with your every day, a principle she has never broken, primarily because we don’t have both! At dinner as the patriarch sliced the prime rib and put it on each plate before passing it around they also shared bread and cute HUGE butter pats molded into the shape of magnolia blooms. Melanie took a roll and a part of one of the blooms, to which the woman of the house said “It is customary in our house to take the whole pat.” My sweet quiet wife told me later that she wanted to respond: ”It is customary in our house to only take what we need.” Over the last 40 years I have learned many such “rules” of etiquette. I continue to learn. Once they are in my head, they don’t want to leave. Some might be useful for some of you.

So here are a dozen not so well known rules of etiquette I have learned, some the hard way. over the years.

• Stand when a woman comes in the room: Most folks know this one. While feminist see this as an affront most women still appreciate the gentlemanly gesture. 
• Do not pick up the dessert fork until the hostess has: I did not know this one until about five years ago. It will change the way you dive in. And if you are the hostess, take your fork and stick it in your dessert if you are serving so everyone else can enjoy your creation. An odd and confusing variant of this rule says that no one is to take a bite until a guest does. 
• Do not extend your hand to a woman unless she extends her hand to you: This is somewhat antiquated but women who know it will appreciate your courtesy. Those who do not may be offended and think you are snobbish. 
• Do not show the bottom of your shoes by crossing your leg where the bottom of your shoe points toward a person. I learned this one from an elder about 20 years ago. The idea is that one of the dirtiest parts of your clothing would be the bottom of your shoe. Who knows what you have stepped on or in. 
• Do not extend your left hand: Sorry but this one is sort of gross but in India in especially poor areas and for years when people were less sanitary than today they would wipe with their left hand. So, yeah. Cured you of that one didn’t I?
• Don’t cough into your right hand: If you do then you share your cold or other germs with anyone who shakes hands with you.
• Don’t point at people: It is rude. Preachers should remember this too. I actually learned a workaround for this from President Bill Clinton back in 1988 when he was just gaining national recognition. He used a crooked finger to gesture with. It works. You might also consider using an open hand gesture.
• When walking with a woman, if at all possible walk on the outside of her: That will make it easier to open doors, etc. It also puts you closer to the street should a car run off or hit a puddle. 
• Keep personal conversations and arguments off social networking sites: While these next two are more 21st Century you should know them. You will never win someone over to your side with a clever meme or what you believe to be a cute political comment. 
• If you take a cell phone call in public, take it outside or to the side if possible. Better yet, just mute your cell phone and sit it aside during any meal (I’m not saying I keep all these).
• Remember that if you feel a need to respond immediately to every incoming text, you’ll lose more in the eyes of the person who’s in front of you than you’ll gain from the unseen people who are benefiting from your efficiency.
• Never call a woman who is wearing heels “older.” First, I didn’t. But I was told this by an upset older lady in heels (she was in her mid-80’s). 

I bet I missed a million. Comment below and be nice: What rules have you learned that have helped you are you have laughed at. 

A Superhero Without A Cape

"He made me realize that preachers are superheroes"

Don’t make it more than it is, but nearly 30 years ago I realized I had the ability to hypnotize people. Over the last three decades I’ve done many shows all over the world. Perhaps the one bit I do is when I tell those under hypnosis that they are a super hero of their own minds creation. They know their super hero name, enemy, purpose, and power. It’s interesting to hear what their minds create. 

Super heroes. Superman, Spiderman, The Black Panther, Flash, Wonder Woman. They fascinate many of us. 

I’ve spent the week with an unusual man. His humble gift of humility, his simple spirit, his servant heart and gentle (and often unsuccessful) humor are quickly seen. I asked him what he wanted to be when he was growing up. He said he wanted to be a superhero. He said it with a laugh. But the more i got to know him the more I began to understand. He is one. He doesn’t wear a cape and hang out in a fortress where he monitors world events to spot someone doing evil, it’s more than that. His superhero strength is love. I heard it as he talked with the church from the pulpit, and again as he gently heard the needs of the old, and there, when he laughed heartily at himself with the teens, then over there as he played with the children. It was clear when he dealt with the barista and the barber. Whether it was the spiritually healthy or those struggling with their own faith, his love for them shown brightly. Yeah, his cape was showing. He’s a superhero in disguise as a middle ages minister. 

I’m not telling you his name, on purpose, he will know I’m writing about him. I suspect he is an average to slightly above average speaker, his lack of self-confidence and ongoing desire to grow and improve would reveal that. He doesn’t overwhelm you with talent, he’s not what you’d call suave, he’s really rather common on the surface. 

And, may I state it clearly, that’s the way most of our ministers are. They are Clark Kent, Peter Parker, or Diana Prince … until. Watch carefully and you’ll spot it. Love. Care. Tenderness. Kindness. Defense of those hurting. Trying to make the way smooth for the struggling. They show up at the hospital of the hurting, the house of distress, the grave of the bereaved. They are there when the doc comes in with tragic news, when a spouse abandons their family, wherever failure stings or fatigue frustrates. Most of them don’t see themselves in this light. They feel more lacking than they are comfortable with. They could never see themselves in a human highlight loop. But there they are, showing up and doing, serving, caring. and yes, loving. Yep, you are my heroes. Thank you for using your true SUPER power, the Love of God!    

Should ministers receive a W2, Misc 1099, both, or neither?

TJI Note: A few months ago we asked one of our best financial advisors, Dale Hubbert, to write some on the matter of churches who will not give W2's. Here is his excellent explanation. Feel free to share this with your elders, leaders, or treasurer. 

by Dale Hubbert

The church is a considered a 501c (3) tax-exempt organization by the IRS  but is not exempt from preparing the proper documents for those it pays.  If a minister is considered an employee of the church the church should provide a W2 form at the end of the year.  IRS Publication 15-A states that one is an employee if the church has the right to control what will be done and how it will be done. This is true even when the employee is given freedom of action. There are various additional considerations in determining if the minister is an employee but generally speaking if a minister “regularly” preaches for a congregation and his work is under the eldership/church leaders he is considered an employee and should receive a W2 form at the end of the year. His employment status is somewhat unique in that he is an employee for W2 purposes but treated as self-employed for social security purposes. Hence the W2 will look different from most others as there will be no social security or Medicare withheld and matched. 

Churches that pay compensation equaling or exceeding $600 in a calendar year are required to provide a Misc 1099 form at the end of the year to the recipient. This would include payment for gospel meetings, special days, etc.  Some ministers speak at various places and are not employees of any congregation.  These men might receive a number of Misc 1099 forms at the end of the year.  They should receive one from every place they received $600 or more.  While there are more factors to consider that has been addressed in this short article it is unlikely that a minister should receive a Misc 1099 form from a congregation that he preaches regularly for and is a member of.   

Minister compensation and reporting can be somewhat complicated and unfortunately, there are congregations that are not in compliance. Ignorance nor failure to comply in the past will not be an excuse should the church be called into question. That is one of the reasons that congregations and ministers need professionals to take care of these matters who are familiar with tax laws regarding churches and ministers.   

Some, not so surprising, research

I have been doing some unscientific research lately. You will not be surprised at the results but they are probably a good reminder to all of us who are in ministry.  

The last several times when speaking to groups of young people who are planning on going into ministry or too young men who have recently begun preaching I’ve asked them: “What has been the attitude that you have most seen out of the preachers who most impacted you when you were growing up to preach?  What did you think of them? What made the biggest impact on you?  

While as unscientific as can be, the responses almost universally have been: “I saw them as men who were joyful, I saw them as men who were happy, I saw them as people who were enjoyable to be around.”

We need to be reminded that those who influence young people to go into ministry most deal with the same pressures, problems, church difficulties, ministry frustrations, and life issues that most all of us deal with. They just have made a determinant decision to approach those obstacles differently, to approach life with joy in spite of challenges, and to be happy in spite of pressures going on around them.  

I think it is a good reminder for all of us in dealing with anyone, but perhaps most especially with young people, that the attitudes we have about the church, about our work, about the brethren, or about ministry affects them. They notice. And the ministers who most exhibit a spirit of joy impact the future more. We may need to work harder to have a joyful disposition in the midst of difficulties. And with what certainly appears to me to be a shortage of capable ministers maybe our attention to our own attitudes will make a difference and excite more young people to be preachers or to go into ministry. I must confess I have not always done that but when I have I have influenced more young people for good.  Approach your work with joy, intensity, excitement, and excellence. It will make a difference. Let’s remember that.  

Axiom #24:

Axiom: The size of the audience does not correlate with the need of the audience. 

Therefore give your best every time you stand up. Jesus preached before multitudes, but the Lord also went in to at least seven homes in our record of His ministry and served before that size group. Peter preached before thousands but he also went from house to house. The largest group I’ve ever spoken before was 12,000ish but recently I spoke to an audience of 24 and one responded to the Gospel. That one was as important as the 12,000. When I stood up to preach I did not know that young college student had never heard the Gospel. You never know who is in that audience. What’s the saying: “Anyone can count the seeds in an apple, but only God can count the number of apples in a seed.”

The fact is that you will not DO your best every time you teach or preach but you can GIVE your best. Yes there will be times when you don’t feel well, when you are exhausted, when you are frustrated, when you have self-doubt BUT stand, present, GIVE your best.

You never know the need in an audience based on the size of an audience. You never know who might be there, you never know if there is someone there who might have never heard the Gospel, you never know when you give your best before that small crowd what God might do with and through someone who is there. The most important audience you will ever preach before is the audience in front of you now! 

Be God’s person, doing God’s Will, speaking God’s Word, with God’s passion, every time you speak.

Therefore give your best every time you stand up. Jesus preached before multitudes, but the Lord also went in to at least seven homes in our record of His ministry and served before that size group. Peter preached before thousands but he also went from house to house. The largest group I’ve ever spoken before was 12,000ish but recently I spoke to an audience of 24 and one responded to the Gospel. That one was as important as the 12,000. When I stood up to preach I did not know that young college student had never heard the Gospel. You never know who is in that audience. What’s the saying: “Anyone can count the seeds in an apple, but only God can count the number of apples in a seed.”

The fact is that you will not DO your best every time you teach or preach but you can GIVE your best. Yes there will be times when you don’t feel well, when you are exhausted, when you are frustrated, when you have self-doubt BUT stand, present, GIVE your best.

You never know the need in an audience based on the size of an audience. You never know who might be there, you never know if there is someone there who might have never heard the Gospel, you never know when you give your best before that small crowd what God might do with and through someone who is there. The most important audience you will ever preach before is the audience in front of you now! 

Be God’s person, doing God’s Will, speaking God’s Word, with God’s passion, every time you speak.

Ryan, Jim, John, and Tom

Her name was Gertrude, she was in her 80’s when I got to know her. Her grandson would come to Nashville every summer and stay a couple of weeks with her. It was always during Vacation Bible School. Little Ryan invited his friend Jim to come with him. Jim, well, both Jim and Ryan loved VBS! It was the highlight of their summer. Jim grew up, he excelled in baseball and started going to church all the time. He obeyed the gospel. After baseball, he got a little startup job. An assistant trainer with one of the AAA farm clubs for the Braves, the Richmond Braves. 

He visited The Church of Christ in Green Hills (at that time Granny White) one Sunday between college and starting his new job. On his attendance card, he wrote that he would be traveling on a bus with the team and some Sunday’s would not be able to attend worship with the church. He asked if we would send him the tapes of the services, GW in those days didn’t just send the sermon but the whole service, singing, prayers, everything. Who could resist his request?

Press Fast Forward. He did well. The kind of trainer that worked hard, knew his stuff, and the players just liked him. In a few years he became head-trainer for Richmond. A few more and he got “called up to the big show.” Atlanta. 

A few more years and by this time we were sending out nearly 100 tapes a week. The elders decided to go to CDs. In making the changeover they had me write to everyone just to make sure they still wanted to be on the list. Jim wrote me back. He thanked me for including him, he sent a donation, and he said that many Sunday’s it was like a lifeline. Then he said that every week after he listened to the tapes he passed them on to one of his friends, John, who then passed it on to one of his, Tom. And that’s how John Smoltz and Tom Glavine listened to my preaching every week. And, that my friends is the impact of an invite to Vacation Bible School. 

What’d you say about how VBS is just entertaining a few kids and it's not really worth the time and energy of doing it?
 

<*_* ^ *_*>

A recent Lifeway study indicated that the most likely church teaching activity that parents who do not go to church would be happy their children would go to is VBS

Bad Times?

I’ve blogged about AND included in one of my books some of the things that assure longevity in ministry. I’d like to use the word “success” but something about that word just feels dirty in the context and what some would think is meant by it. But regardless of how we package it we need to investigate how to help guys coming into ministry to stay in it is possible. An additional but vital one occurred to me.

A while back I was watching a congregation that I know to be going through major conflict. They have a couple of folks who are pushing ideas that are not in any way healthy for the Lord’s People and that are divisive in nature. It has created discomfort in the leadership as to the best way to approach it and even some apparent division as to IF to approach it. 

In preparing for the engagement I went on their website to see where my assigned lesson fit in with the larger series. It was not simple to find so I had to go back four or five weeks to see the larger theme. As I read the minister’s words each week in the bulletin, highlighting the good, commending those who were serving, and encouraging faith, faithfulness and service, I was impressed with his optimism. Knowing what I know, knowing the struggle, knowing that all is not well, he chooses to focus on the good. He has decided to see the better inspire of the difficult.

It may be difficult to hear, but those who seem to always struggle seem to dwell on the difficult, muddle through ever mess, plod through every problem.

And it occurs to me that this is in fact what happens with every highly effective minister. They preach, pray for, and plan toward what can be and promote what is - good. I know some of you won't accept this reality but that guy who seems always to have it together and his work always seems to go swimmingly - he faces most of the same challenges the other ministers do.

So, want to do well in ministry? Foster the ability to see the finest even in the frustrating times.